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I love exquisitely executed food. But, then again, I'm a socialist namby pamby arugula eating hippie.

Al has the common sense view on eating that you all should see.

  • Secrets of the Fast Food world! Did you know Arby's has something called a Jamocha shake? Now you do! Thanks to Al!

  • How to be treated like a VIP at Fast Food restaurants! Get a burrito bowl instead! Twice the food to fit into your gaping maw! Thanks to Al!

  • Sage advice from "Business Al" (he's a knowledgeable and experienced businessman as well!) "This actually reminded me of all the folks who turn up their nose at Taco Bell or McDonald's, as if these companies got to be behemoths by serving 2% of the population. Why are they popular? Because their food is yummy." Yummy, Al, Yummy indeed.

  • Weirded out about eating horse? DON'T BE! "I listened to some of our local morning show on my way to an appointment this morning, and they too wondered what the big deal was about eating horse. Several callers reported having tried it, one described it as tasting like a "mild venison" and another said it was very tasty.

    One of the hosts said he didn't think we'd ever get to the point of eating dogs and cats, but he thinks we'll eventually see other meats, like horses, rabbits, and so on far more accepted. Other callers spoke of having eaten squirrel, rabbit, possum, raccoon. None were worse for wear afterwards.

    I agree, and think with all the "foodies" and specialty eats in our culture, like microbrews and micro wineries, we're probably not that far away from a cooking show that features regional, off the beaten path foods." Think horse is bad for you? NEIGH! Thanks to Al!

  • STOP PAYING MORE MONEY FOR BONES! BONES ARE NO GOOD! "I refuse to buy roasts or steak with a bone, because I don't like paying for something I cannot eat" Flavor is overrated! Thanks to Al!

  • BONES BAD PART 2 For my money, chicken wings are too messy anyway. I make them once in a while on the grill, and sit by myself at the kitchen table and eat, with a roll of paper towels. We always order the "boneless" version when we're out. Thanks to Al!

  • Are you paying too much money for actual crab? Listen to Al, crab is for Elitists! "One thing I often make for myself if I'm not low carbing it is mashed potatoes with some type of seafood...I've used shrimp, but I prefer scallops or crab (I actually like the imitation crab more than the real thing), and then I put in a bit of bacon. It's simple, but tasty." MMM. KRABBY! Thanks to Al!


    Just a start to this new forum dedicated to the most brilliant man on earth. Just ask him!
  • Original Post

    Replies sorted oldest to newest

    quote:
    Originally posted by CAPackFan95:
  • Sage advice from "Business Al" (he's a knowledgeable and experienced businessman as well!) "This actually reminded me of all the folks who turn up their nose at Taco Bell..."


  • I for one do not appreciate this attempt to belittle Taco Bell, a corporate leader in helping to save us from ourselves.


    Taco Bell.
    Monday, February 18, 2013 (2/18/2013 11:46:00 PM) - Al

    Busiest day on Ramblings in the past month...if anyone knows why (for instance, if I was linked somewhere, I can only see the past hundred, and I do not see a pattern). My guess would be Gamel and many folks spending more time than usual online 'cause the boss was off today.


    I'm sure Al says
    (2/15/2013 05:05:00 PM) - Al

    Google Ad Sense provides the ads some of you see at the top of the page. Ramblings get paid based on how many people visit the site that do not have ad blocking software. I understand why many have this software, some sites are nearly impossible to navigate without it. I have a simple request, if you use adblock, click on your "tools" box and tell it to allow Ramblings to display ads... as far as I know, it will not affect your enjoyment (if it does, please write, as I do not put ads between posts for this very reason) of the site. I obviously will not know if you choose to do this, but if you do, thank you.


    I use adblock.

    And, nothing will affect my enjoyment of the site Al, unless you stop posting your brilliance.
    Looks like Al is off today, so we could be in for a plethora of intellectual gems.

    quote:
    (2/22/2013 12:52:00 PM) - Al

    I was just looking for something in our pantry, and came across a box of unopened Booberry cereal. I bought it at Halloween time in 2005 or 2006, as it's "best by" date is Jan 2007. So, it's time for a poll...how will it taste?

    What condition will the Booberry cereal be in?
    Visible signs of age, such as mold, bugs, etc.
    Probably be stale, but very edible.
    Not as good as fresh, but pretty close.
    Can't tell the difference between this and a box right off the shelf.

    FYI, I also found some soft granola bars that were "best before" Sept 2011...taste like I just bought them yesterday.


    Expiration labels are for pussies. I don't understand why people think that 4-month-old milk is bad for you. Probably because of the old media and their lies. It's a little chunky and smelly, but I like to think of it as my Freedom Cocktail. I wash it down with a Krab sandwich on bread from 2006.
    If someone told me they knew of an adult over the age of 40 that found a hidden 8 year old box of unopened Booberry cereal in their pantry, ate it for the simple sake of seeing if it was still good 5 years after the "best by" date, then posted about it in a public forum...

    Even if you were to lie it would be virtually impossible to portay another human being as a bigger loser than the Booberry story.
    Of course, Boo Berry is usually eaten with milk, as with most cereal. Once I put milk on it, not only was the cereal delicious, the moisture seemed to rehydrate the marshmallows.

    This is why I need a life coach. No one in the old media told me to put milk on my cereal, or that it would rehydrate it. I've been tearing up the roof of my mouth eating dry Capt Crunch when all this time I could have added milk.
    quote:
    Of course, Boo Berry is usually eaten with milk, as with most cereal. Once I put milk on it, not only was the cereal delicious, the moisture seemed to rehydrate the marshmallows.


    Given Al's physical appearance I'm surprised he even uses milk on Boo Berry. Gravy seems to be more his deal because he sure isn't skipping many meals.

    quote:
    I, for one, am shocked that Al isn't a beer drinker.


    He strikes me more as a wine cooler, Zima type of dude Or maybe I'm just confusing him with
    back in the day...used to be able to order the mac sauce as an extra condiment ....we dipped our fries in it....not sure if alya ever thought of that...but it was like a dream from heaven.

    It is easy to see why the chicken would want/need a life coach like this that can think outside the box.

    I wonder what Al thinks of Marshawn Lynch
    (3/11/2013 09:00:00 AM) - Al

    Two ingredient Lemon Bars. 1 box angel food cake mix 2 cans lemon pie filling (the recipe originally called for only 1 can) Mix dry cake mix and cans of pie filling together in large bowl (I just mixed it by hand) Pour into greased baking pan. Bake at 350 degrees for 25 minutes or until top is starting to brown.--Sweet Tooth

    As a public service to those of you that are naturally thin (we hate you) and eat carbs.

    How simple is that?


    I can taste the preservatives from here!
    An entire block of it too.

    Went to McD's & Tried Al's little trick today.

    It works!

    Order McDouble off $1 menu
    Minus Ketchup & Mustard
    Add Lettuce
    Add Mac Sauce

    You got yourself a Big Mac (minus the 3rd piece of bread in the middle)

    I shoved 4 of those $1 "Big Macs" into my gaping maw & washed it down with a Diet Coke. (Which I snuck in) Al is cool. Total cost = $4.34

    (3/11/2013 09:38:14 AM) - Al

    I hate airlines. First of all those darn airline seats are too dang small. Who are they designed for, skinny guys like John Goodman?! I'm a grown rambling man!

    Also they've scaled back on the in-flight meals, really?! I get pretty gosh darn hungry rambling & hacking & wheezing my way through security! By golly I need... check that... DESERVE a burger when I get seated... well kinda seated...


    Last edited by Shoeless Joe
    quote:
    (3/14/2013 11:30:00 AM) - Al

    Sliced vine ripe tomatoes:

    4 vine ripe tomatoes
    Kosher salt
    Fresh cracked pepper
    Slice tomatoes and season with salt and pepper. Serve.


    Actual recipe I just came across.

    I think the internet just hit rock bottom


    No lemon cake mix or deep-fried lard = crappy recipe.

    Vegetables are for commies anyway. You know they grow those in France, right?
    (3/18/2013 10:00:00 AM) - Al

    The funny thing about the war on fats is that many feel carbs are far worse for you, for a plethora of reasons.

    And, for whatever reason, the nanny state pushes carbs on the public like old sitcoms give coffee to drunks...neither one works, by the way.


    Nanny State always pushing carbs on me. I swear I can't go 15 minutes without some government thug sticking a funnel down my gullet for forcing me to eat pounds and pounds of pasta and bread.
    quote:
    (3/20/2013 10:00:00 AM) - Al

    Just made a batch of low carb muffins. I had a couple, and they are far from "normal," but they're pretty darn good, probably the texture of something cowboys used to eat on the range.

    I decided to have one with a sausage patty in a sandwich, so I opened up the microwave...only to find the butter I had softened still in there. I have to imagine with that in there, they'd be outstanding.


    I like to go to McDonald's and order a Big Mac, a double QPer with cheese and two orders of fries. It's OK, though, as I have a Diet Coke with it because it's healthy.
    As a defender of and a believer in freedom, Al would never live in some Commie ****hole where they regulated the amount of crap you can consume. Al and I believe that you should have all the freedom in the world to be a disgusting fat **** and to eat whatever garbage you want.

    Now excuse me - I have some women to go fall on.

    quote:
    I decided to have one with a sausage patty in a sandwich, so I opened up the microwave...only to find the butter I had softened still in there. I have to imagine with that in there, they'd be outstanding.


    Why stop there? Add 8 slices of cheese and a couple of fried eggs. And some Big Mac sauce. And gravy. Lots of gravy. Al likes gravy. Throw on some 2 yr old Boo Berry on top as a garnish and you're good to go.

    What pisses Al off though is the natural skinny people don't have to worry about that delicacy.
    Thank goodness I got to see another how-to post on diet. My cholesterol was starting to drop to below dangerous levels.

    quote:
    (4/12/2013 11:00:00 AM) - Al

    Quite a weekend in the Ramblings household...the Rambling wife is off on her annual bell choir festival, which leaves the Rambling males (me, the son, and the dog) for a bachelor weekend.

    We're going to see The Croods, eat some Chinese buffet (just the lean protein for me, thanks), and enjoy some of Daddy's finest meal making (his favorites are my grilled cheese cheeseburgers, which is, yes, grilled cheese with a burger inside, and grilled cheese with steak um, and grilled cheese with bacon)...I just realized all my cooking ability is simply putting delicious red meat into grilled cheese.

    My secret...don't skimp on the cheese. If you put so much in, the middle doesn't melt...microwave it for 15-30 seconds. Also, you can use mayo (even light mayo) instead of butter, it will be less greasy and oodles easier to spread.

    Feel free to steal my ideas, they're just sandwiches.


    So if I have some well-aged Boo Berry for breakfast with a low-carb sausage and cheese biscuit tray, any or all of the above for lunch and then head out to Golden Corral for dinner, it'll be the perfect food day.
    There's nothing quite like getting your lean protein fix at the Chinese buffet. That and your yearly allotment of MSG, saturated fats, and burn all your clothing aromas.

    Although, the good news for Al is they don't serve much cheese at the far east scarf and barf so he has plenty of time to balance things out with the old 6 layer griddle surprises at home.
    Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight, Al... it's worth the buck to drive to WalMart. I'm sure it has nothing to do with all those hotties behind the counters.

    quote:
    (5/05/2013 02:18:00 PM) - Al

    We have been making shrimp scampi once a week of late, it goes with potatoes, pasta, or even cauliflower if you wish to avoid carbs. The Rambling wife stopped to pick some up last evening on her way home from church so she'd have it for today. It was "on sale" for $5.99, regular $8.99. Knowing it is $5 all the time at Wal Mart, she decided to pass, as is often the case when we stop at one our two little groceries within a mile or two of our house.

    I don't feel sorry for those that avoid WM because they feel they are too successful and efficient (many days, I tell myself that's why I don't have more sales as well). I pity them for lacking the sense to maximize their income.

    But, because I believe in freedom, people have every right to overspend on shrimp, and every other item in their cart.


    Wal-Mart fetish = one of the truly intriguing qualities of the enigma that is our hero Al.
    considering the quality of products at wal mart is easily on par with everyone else out there, clearly those of you not buying everything there are morons.

    Buy local? Moron.

    And damn all of you *******s who think you are to successful and efficient to buy **** from al. Clearly if his sales are down, it is someone else's fault.
    There's that old Al self-awareness coming through once again.

    quote:
    (5/22/2013 10:00:00 AM) - Al

    I feel sorry for people who tell me they are going camping, but that guy on the American Family ad who says he's "chasing this amazing dream" by visiting national parks makes me laugh every time.

    It's like me trying to eat every flavor of blizzard at DQ. While I might think it's kind of cool, pretending it's an accomplishment is a stretch.


    Confused

    quote:
    ABOUT ME
    I spy. I spy on buffet restaurants and tell you all about them.

    The author of this site is not paid or given any remuneration from the restaurants and chains discussed here. All meals are paid for by the author. Opinions are honest and without prejudice. The name I use on this site is a "pen" name and not my own, so that restaurants will never suspect that I am there.


    It's like an unholy merger of marklawrence and Al.

    That lettuce wrapped around 8,000 calories will make a big difference when he plugs in that VCR and lets the ol' 8-track rip in his exercise room.

     

    (7/16/2013 12:30:00 PM) - Al 

     

    Second visit to Serious Burger in Appleton yesterday, right by the mall area. Second time both myself and the Rambling son walked out convinced we had the best burger known to man. Mine was delicious even in a lettuce wrap. The juices flow out like a river. Caramelized mushrooms, caramelized onions, other toppings, free. Cheese is supposed to be $1, but they didn't charge either one of us for it. 

    Looks like Al won't be getting his chicken stock injection tonight.  Probably time to toss a Big Mac in the blender.

     

    .........................

     

    (8/09/2013 09:52:00 PM) - Al 

     

    Yesterday, I took our rotisserie chicken carcass, put it in the crock pot, and filled it with water. It was on low for 24 hours, and late this afternoon, I put salt, garlic, and other spices in and strained out all the bones. I left in out on the counter in a large plastic mixing bowl to cool down before putting it in the fridge, about a quart plus of delicious homemade chicken stock

    I went to see if it was cool in the early evening. The Rambling son, assuming it was water, had dumped it out when he filled the dishwasher.

    This is why all the great chefs are single and childless. 

     

    BONES!!!!


    (8/17/2013 03:36:00 PM) - Al

    I put a roast in the slow cooker this morning at 6AM, when the Rambling dog insists it is light enough that it must be time for breakfast. The problem with our roasts from the Rambling inlaws is they always have a bone in the middle, and the one today had a bone the approximate size of a human head. What looks like about three pounds of beef turns into about a pound and a half. Of course, given the quality of beef and the price we pay, I shouldn't be complaining...but I do. 

    (8/22/2013 01:30:00 PM) - Al

     

    Unless she's there looking beautiful, I don't see people flocking to eat $40 pasta dishes.

     

    I had a $40 burger in Vegas, it was awsum.  Clearly I don't have a pulse on Vegas like al does (and clearly not the culinary chops as we completely skipped Golden Coral).  As a casual fan of pasta, I'm guessing Giada will do fine.   

    Originally Posted by CAPackFan95:

    (8/26/2013 01:31:00 PM) - Al 

     

    Remember, lobster used to be fed to prisoners, considered nearly worthless

    I prefer the artificial crab and lobster to the real thing, and that is just cheap whitefish and haddock. 

     

    Al is true MURICAN!  He don't need none of that fancy schmancy real lobster or crab!

    Haddock would be too expensive for the imitation crab delicacy.  Normally they use the true champion the pollack.  I think haddock would ruin the exquisite flavor of this twice a year splurge.

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