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Copy of Speech

"Hello, Ladies and Gentlemen of the Des Moines Chamber of Commerce....oh, what, this isn't Des Moines...well it is now. From now on you will refer to your city as Des Moines. Anyhow, back to my speech.

I just want you and everyone else to know that in this day and age, you can still be a winner, even if you are a loser. Look at the Seattle Seahawks...they lost a game, their quarterback threw an interception, but they got credited with a win and a touchdown pass. The lesson we learn here is to never give up, even if you fail miserably, there exists the opportunity to turn it into a victory. All you need is to have someone incompetent make the final decision.

So, if you blow the sale and cost your company a multi-million dollar account, don't fret about it. Maybe your company's accountant will misplace a decimal and your company will come out ahead and you will be a hero. Or, maybe you did rob that convenience store...maybe the police will arrest the wrong guy. Heck, they might even charge him with simultaneous possession of a deadly weapon.

There is hope. So go out there and don't be completely afraid to mess up and even, destroy the streets of Des Moines....because there is always hope that you will come out on top."

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