It's not pretty. Adrian Peterson regains his All Day nickname by rushing for 400 yards and four touchdowns. Cordarelle Patterson returns a kickoff for a TD as the Packers stand around after being flagged for being offsides, and they're confused thinking it was a dead ball. Rodgers is sacked 12 times, Tolzien comes in and leads two garbage time TDs, revealing after the game that he is, indeed, a Muslim and grateful to Rodgers for standing up for him in the previous game. Eddie is caught eating a hot dog on the sidelines given to him by Ezra Johnson. McCarthy gives offensive play calling duties to Dom Capers, and has Jordy Nelson working the D side of the ball.
Score at half, Vikings 50, Packers 3
Final score: vikings elevnty jillion, Packers 6. Crosby makes both of his field goal attempts, but Janis is now holding for him.