Good evening ladies,
Against the advice of my lawyers and therapists, I am once again operating all NFL Draft viewing operations for Timesfour. Somehow, between the constant negging/second guessing of seasoned professional talent evaluaters, the bland yammering of Kiper/McShay/Mayock/Dez/Bongya, and cringing every time some Hooray Henry Texans fan gets invited up to the podium to butcher the name of a 5th round pick, my love of copypasting and embedding Youtube videos with rap songs pretty much everyone on here finds offensive overrules it all.
Here are simple rules I came up with to make sure that we all have a great time!
- Please be nice to me.
- Do not own me.
- If your birthday falls on draft weekend, you have to change it to the weekend after next.
- Any mention of Capers of any kind or context will result in an electric shock to the balls. No question asked. No exceptions.
- The NFL is continuing to ruin a niche event by trying to add all sorts of distracting side shows and gimmicks to make it more appealing to the "mainstream" viewer. These changes are purely cosmetic and superficial gimmicks that don't solve any of the league's real problems, which when you think about is pretty much how I run my life except I don't have Robert Kraft using me as a puppet or a bunch of concussed steroid addicts trying to sue me lol.